Posts by life is to short

42

Did anyone in the congregation discourage you from going to college?

by Trapped in JW land in

i remember being out on service with an elder when i was 17. he asked me what i plan on doing after high school.

i told him i was thinking of going to college to be a teacher.

he then asked me, "do you think this system is going to be around that long"?

life is to short

Yes! After coming back from Bethel I got a job that would pay for colleage class. So I started to take a few courses. I never told anyone in the hall that I was doing the classes and I totally enjoyed them. Than one of the classes happened to be on a Saturday morning, and I (gasp) missed field service that day for the class.

Well being my husband was an elder, the next Saturday morning I was RIPED to shreds in front of everyone by a busy body sister who felt like she was in charge of the hall. I was asked to explain why I would waste my time taking classes when I was an elders wife knowing the system was ending any day. I was totally humiliated in front of everyone. No one stood up for me in the least as she was yelling at me so I mumbled something stupid to get her to shut up. That morning my husband suggested that I stop taking classes, because I might not be setting a good example, so I did.

Yet others in the hall did get their AA the same way, through work paying for it. I still feel bitter over it and do not understand why I was so beat up over it, I wish I had stood up for myself better but I had no self confindence in myself back than.

LITS

46

WTBT$ will no longer support Elder's legally....

by Newly Enlightened in

we received an email and are wondering if anyone can verify this little tidbit of news.

does anyone know if this is true or not?.

maybe any elder's on here?.

life is to short

This would be very interesting. They stopped supporting JW's who go onto property with no trespassing signs back I believe in the early 90's. I know where I live JW's never respected the no trespassing signs and a car group from the hall the next town over went into this guys yard, we lived in the country. The rumor was that the householder locked the gate behind them, called the police and all the JW's in the car had to pay for violating the sign.

I tried to get the rumor confirmed but no one would verify it, though after that NO ONE in my hall ever went into a no trespassing home after that.

I can so easily see this as being true.

LITS

94

Avoid Going back to the JW's - Educate Yourself about Mind Control

by flipper in

jw
friends

i've talked with some good friends on the board about this before and we seem to be in agreement : one reason ( among many ) that some disfellowshipped jw's go back and return to the wt organization is because they are full of uneeded guilt or uneeded fear because they haven't educated themselves about how the wt society uses mind control tactics to deceive them into thinking they have " nowhere else to go " .

i understand that some dfed ones may go back to the organization for family and friends- however- it's an exrecise in futility because once you learn the truth about the truth you cannot undo what you heard.

so some may just go back and live a fake jw life to appease family- but just think of how that can damage a person's emotional and mental health playing the fake jw game the rest of their lives !

life is to short

Very great post flipper.

I think the religion gets into the deep parts of ones mind and unless you work to change it will come up and up again and again. You will either be supper depressed or a very frustrated person unless you do the work to really learn TTATT and that is really hard work. Most people do not want to read and learn, especially us born in's. We were programed to just sit and listen and nod our heads and then do what we were told, but not to really read or learn anything out side of the religion.

Everyone also is in different places in their lives like OTWO said and we should not judge them or get mad at them. I know one ex JW family who spent years and years and years going over the 587 607 debate, they had every WT and Awake and "wordly" articles on the subject that exists. I mean I listened for hours and hours and hours and hours to them go over it and over it. They gave me tons of prints outs on it. They were so passionate on it that I just let them talk. But to me once I understood the basics of it I was good.

Now the pedophiles problem is huge for me in the religion. I have have seen with my own eyes three pedophiles in my hall but to this family it meant nothing, it was like OH well just move on. They actually forbid me to even bring up the subject when I was around them and I was not to tell anyone that JW's have pedophiles in the religion because as they put it, 'it made me look like I was still angry'.? Why should I not be angry? They were so angry about the 587 607 thing that one of the daughters even sent out over 200 letters to ones in the congregations that they knew in their area. And yet I was over board for telling ones about child molesters in the hall?

Anyway that is why I have backed off from even posting even on this sight. It just really hurts to get so rebucked and put down by not only JW's but even ex JW's.

I just think so many just do not leave the "I am right I have the chosen religion God is with me, you are the one in the wrong attitude" that was drilled into us so strongly in the religion. Many have a hard time respecting the rights of others to have a different opinion.

LITS

100

10 Years out of the JW Organization- What I've Learned ( For what it's Worth)

by flipper in

jw
friends

10 years ago i stopped attending jehovah's witness meetings for good.

walked out of the kingdom hall cold turkey never to return based on injustices i observed among others and myself at the hands of elders giving out not god's counsel but personal opinions as counsel .

some of them weren't even giving out wt society counsel- just personal opinions.

life is to short

I just saw this post flipper it is so great. You so spot on, everything you said is so true. I love the way you write. All the points you brought out are so true, the part about being told over and over we are special people, etc alway made me feel strange when I was a JW. I never liked that I just did not know why. I remember so many JW's that felt eltist when we would go on coffee breaks and look down on the other customers in the store. Sometimes I just wanted to crawl away when we were in a coffee shop. OH my goodness you are so spot on with that point. Especially around this time of year with Christmas some JW's would be so rude to others.

Anyway thank you for being here to help people and your stand on the child abuse issue. I am so glad that you have given a voice to the problem. So many people even ex JW's do not want to know that there is a pedophile problem in the relgion. I am just so gald that you stand up and talk about it.

You and Mrs. Flipper mean the world to me with the help you have given to me and so many others.

Thank you.

LITS

186

Just out of curiosity, how many elders (current & ex) do we have here?

by mrquik in

jw
friends

me.

life is to short

Thanks Rawe for counting all the posts.

I am with Magwitch. My husband was an elder for 21 of our 26 year marriage. It did huge damage to our marriage, that still hurts so much even now. I had no voice in our marriage. My feelings and needs were never considered it was the religion first, I was always second or thrid.

It never mattered if I felt sick and wished to stay home I had to be there to set the example. Than after the meetings the long, long elders meetings and I was stuck with a bunch of elder's wives who refused to let me into their little groups so I would sit alone in the car.

No couples time at all, no anniversarys much less of course no holidays. We only got to enjoy our first year anniversary than my husband got to busy and our second year anniversary I spent alone in the car until midnight than I went over to another elders wives home who hated me until 2:00 in the morning when my husband finally came to get me, he was ticked off by whatever happened in that meeting and made me feel like scum for wanting to have an evening to gether as husband and wife, after all the congregation came first and I should have known better than to marry an elder if I did not like it. After that I just gave up trying to have anniversarys together, it hurt too much. There were no date nights of couse, there was no bonding as marriage mates.

If someone needed my husband it never mattered what was going on in our life together who ever needed him came first. It was like being married to a doctor on call expect there was no money and we lived on nothing so my husband could put "Jehovah" first. The only reason he is not an elder today is because I was not in subjection enough. Seems because of my stand on not wanting pedophiles around me put my husband in a bad place with the other elders.

Yeh the good times of being an elders wife.

LITS

50

Anyone here close to Grace Gough/Mouthy?

by satinka in

jw
friends

if anyone knows mouthy/grace gough, it would be awesome if someone would look in on her.

she is feeling the effects of the ice storm and is all alone and it is christmas eve.

i just sent her an email and received this reply back:.

life is to short

Merry Christmas Grace glad to see you are OK. Wish I did not live 3000 milies away, I would love to spend some time with you today but ((((((HUGS)))))) from here will have to do. Wish you were not so alone but at least you know we are all thinking of you.

LITS

11

Fred Franz talk before Gilead explaining why there was NO 1st Century GB

by BU2B in

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-vymdlw83c.

life is to short

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87

Kim's call to HQ's...

by Newly Enlightened in

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xltqvpy6i0q.

life is to short

marked

18

IS there anything one moment or experience that still haunts you?

by confusedandalone in

jw
friends

last night me and the wife were talking about things that happened to each of us while in the borg that we wished we could have reacted differently... i mean really put someone in thier place for the foolish thing they said or the deplorable action that enacted upon you.

my wife literally almost came to tears relating something that i was not aware... i wanted to end up going back to the hall for a monthy or so just too handle it.. .

do you have anything you would like to share to help us remove our own thoughts from our minds lol.

life is to short

There are so many hurts it is so hard to name only a few. The total lack of love was unreal. When we were first married my husband was in a hall where the CO had asked him to go, it was a horrible hall. My husband was the only elder at the time. The way I was treated as a new wife is beyond decribing, I was yelled at all the time, told I was stupid to my face. We were pioneering and when my husband was doing some elder thing the sisters would not let me even go out in service with them. When my husband was there they refused to use their cars and my husband said everyone had to go out unlike how I was treated, so there were times when we would have six people in our Honda Civic. We beat the crap out of our car.

I talked to the CO and told him I was loosing it and he rebucked me telling me I was being selfish and that Jehovah needed my husband now that is why he was acked to go to this hall, I could have him (my husband) in the new system which was going to happen really soon. That was 25 years ago.

This does not even begin to touch on what went on while we were at Bethel, and then after we come back and the pedophile problem in the hall which was beyond hell.

I wish I could let go of the pain but its there, its like this huge wound that is just there, the hatefullness of these people knows no bounds. Like when my husband had a major heart attack and I called the CoBE and his wife answered and told me she could not help me because she had to go out in service, how while I was at the hospital even the Chaplin was blown away by how alone I was. The Chaplin said she had never seen a JW with no one there for the family.

This is just a cold hartless religion.

73

this week's wt study

by thedog1 in

i conducted the wt study tonight on higher education.

i wondered what the reaction of the bros and sis would be.

there was no deviation from the idea that a university education is not a good idea.

life is to short

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